You Know Jared Never Had This Problem

In my quest to live a healthier lifestyle and balancing that with a life on the go, I often find myself at a Subway. Sure, I guess I could plan better and pack a supper everytime I have to rush from work to church or other food-less function, but alas, I don't. In the past, a swing through Mickey D's or Wendy's did the trick, but it doesn't really work well with my new regime. Confession: Yes, I do still eat at those places periodically.

Over the past few weeks, I've encountered challenges with my local Subways. You'd think ordering a sub sandwich wouldn't be so tough, but you'd be surprised. A few weeks ago, I headed to one of these joints after church. Wednesday nights are a challenge as I don't have time to eat prior to our Bible Study, so I normally grab something afterwords. I drove up to one of the three Subways on my route home to find this sign on the door: "We ran out of bread - closing at 8pm" Now, what is a Subway without bread...a "way?" So, I headed on to the next Subway, which was packed, probably due to the bread shortage a few streets over. I shared with the staff about my plight with store number two and they said, 'Oh yeah, that store runs out of bread all the time.' Nice.

The next week I decided to try a completely different Subway in hopes to avoid the breadless trend and encountered a worse scenario. This Subway happens to be located very close to two hospitals so I assumed they'd be tops on providing great service for the traffic their store surely receives. Bad assumption. I walked in and got in line behind a guy buying five footlongs. Don't blame him with the current $5 footlong promotional going on. I don't know that I've seen two more slow-moving, depressed Subway workers in my life. They needed a hug. But, since they were two steps from a comatose state, I was doing good to get them to understand my order, much less communicate my sympathy.

As I slowly progressed through the line, the next customer came in. She was on her cell phone, which is a huge pet peeve of mine that I'll address in a future post. But, to shorthand it....people, put your phone on silent for 15 minutes while you order, that's what voicemail is for! Thankfully she was behind me so as not to make this molasses-style progression any worse. She got off the phone right before her order was taken and then her phone burst into song and she was back on it again, just as the Comatose Subway Chick was trying to determine her order. At this point, it became hilarious...but it had only just begun...

The nice footlong-purchaser man had arrived at the register....only to be told that his bill was $30. What? For five footlongs? Oh, minor point Comatose Subway Chick failed to point out...not ALL footlongs are $5, just some. Nice. Sandwiches made, the nice man just coughed up the buckage to get out of there. Moral of that story....read the fine print in those ads.

Thankfully, there was enough bread and my order was finally done. I grabbed a Coke Zero from the fridge and, oh, um, it's broken, so the drink is hot. Fine, I'll just take it home and put it over ice. Sigh. It's tough eating healthy.